Okay, so here’s the thing – you know when you’re just minding your own business in the year 3076, and boom, you pop out of cryosleep like a forgotten toaster waffle (weird visual, but it works). Well, that’s basically what’s happening in this new game, Stardiver, which, fun fact, is headed to your Nintendo Switch soon-ish. And honestly, the Switch is like that gadget you remember only when nothing else is around, which I guess fits the whole forgotten planet vibe. Anyway—wait, hang on, let me backtrack.
Right, so you’ve been snoozing for, what, 387 days? Floating around this old, mystery-shrouded planet trying to find some missing AI research ship. And surprise, surprise, things go awry because some sneaky, hostile force is out there being a real nuisance.
And Zera – that’s your ship’s AI – is basically your cosmic tour guide through this chaotic mess. Imagine an AI with the personality of your grandma, minus the cookies, guiding you through 20 bizarre missions where you’re trying to piece together what happened on this oddball planet. But, it’s got a twist! They say it’s not just about exploration and discovery—important stuff like responsibility and, let’s be honest, figuring out how to hightail it back home.
The publisher’s got this spiel about the game being this wild mix of narrative and visuals and who-knows-what. It’s about choices. Those things that weigh on you like when you’re deciding if that expired milk is still drinkable. Anyway, Stardiver promises to be more than just a pretty face—it’s supposed to stick with you like a catchy, annoying tune.
Oh, did I mention some features? There’s this gigantic underwater world—all 30 km² of it, full of colorful biomes, plus you can switch up your view from inside the cockpit to swimming around like an awkward fish. And there’re achievements, because who doesn’t love those shiny digital trophies? You can even take screenshots when you’re smacked in the face by the stunning but eerie surroundings.
Throw in themes of AI consciousness and moral choice… which, let’s be real, sound deep, but might just make your brain do cartwheels trying to process everything. And the whole thing is hitting the Nintendo eShop in 2025. Which, let’s face it, sounds far away, but isn’t really—not when you consider how fast time flies these days.
So yeah, keep an eye out for Stardiver if you’re into that kind of sci-fi, existential crisis vibe. I mean, who doesn’t love a good cosmic mystery, right? Or maybe that’s just me.
